When I get home you're so dead
by We-Are-Groot
Summary: Tony thinks he has Bruce right where he needs him, until the physicist makes the decision to leave. Tony over thinks, and for once, has a heart. Bruce is alarmed by feelings. Steve Rogers saves the day (again) and is also done with your shit.


Five hours and forty six minutes.

Not that Tony Stark was counting, he had hastily slid away to the lab as a way of forcing the time to pass. _Five hours, forty six minutes and twenty nine seconds. _It was becoming like a mantra, the only thing keeping him grounded as his heart thumped heavily against the arc reactor, his breath coming in short bursts as his lungs closed up. _Shit shit shit. _The last thing he needed was to crack right now, not when Bruce was out on the streets, not when General Ross could have easily got to him before Steve did. He needed to focus and think clearly, breaking down would gain him nothing. Bruce. Oh sweet idiotic Bruce Banner. The bashful physicist that had clambered his way into Tony's heart, or would had, had he had one. The one so fixated that he didn't deserve love that he fled before he had even got the chance to try. Tony put his head in his hands and sighed, trying and failing to slow down his heart rate as his mind kept flooding back to that morning.

_He knew something was up when he woke to empty sheets. He had grown into a routine of rolling over and grasping the passed out form next to him, or just watching him as he slept. Tony wasn't a creeper, just watching the rise and fall of Bruce's chest as he slept peacefully was enough to ease Tony's creeping anxiety when he woke up from the dreams that didn't leave him screaming. The cold space next to him as he sprawled freely left him uneasy. _ "_Jarvis?" He croaked, voice thick with sleep. _ "_Yes, Sir?" _ "_Where's Bruce?" _ _There was a beat of silence, as if the AI was contemplating his response. _ "_Sir, I regret to inform you that Doctor Banner vacated the tower this morning." _ _Tony's stomach lurched and he suddenly felt sick. _ "_When?" He realised his tone was sharp, covering up the emotions stirring in the pit of his stomach. _ "_An hour ago, Sir."_ "_Dammit Jarvis, why didn't you wake me?!"  
"If I may, Sir. Doctor Banner requested specifically not to let you know." _ "_Did he say where he was going?" Fear edged in his voice like poison. _ _Again, the AI paused and Tony began to wonder specifically how well he'd designed his speech mechanisms. _ "_No, he failed to mention his whereabouts." _

He gripped his hair tightly as he forced himself into the present. His lungs were burning as he curled up in a ball, trying to think of something, _anything, _to calm himself down. He tried to imagine Bruce next to him, hand protective and reassuring as he rubbed circles along his back, other hand gripping his shoulder, gently reminding him to breathe. Any other time that would have been reassuring, but this time the thought of the man's gentleness made Tony's eyes sting and he scrunched them up with deliberate force, determined to block the tears threatening to flow. How had he been so stupid? He should have known. Hell, he should have been able to tell if Bruce had been a bit off. He had told him from the very beginning that he hadn't intended to trap him but he quite clearly had.  
"Oh Jarvis." He croaked.  
"What did I do wrong?"  
"According to my calculations Sir, Dr Banner's decision was completely spur of the moment."  
Great. So not only had Tony let his boyfriend do a runner he had also neglected to notice him deteriorating. Well, if this wasn't proof enough that Tony was the worlds greatest jackass he didn't know what was. He had been doing _so well. _He had somehow managed to get Bruce to trust him and finally let him and...now he'd just ruined it and he had no idea how to apologise because he had no idea how he'd managed to fuck it up. Bruce had assured him so many damn times that no matter what he wasn't going to leave, that he had finally found somewhere to call home and a reason to stay. Tony slammed the nearest thing he could find, a wretch, and launched it into the wall, feeling a fleeting sense of accomplishment at the sound of metal smashing. He kicked the table, rage flooding though his system.

How had he let his happen? For the first time in his life the physicist was comfortable but Tony had to ruin it with feelings. He couldn't have just left his best friend in peace he had to act on some stupid impulses and force him into something he so blindingly obviously didn't want any part of. But, Bruce had kissed him back. Bruce had said yes.  
_I'd do whatever you asked of me, you should know that much.  
_ _I wouldn't be here if I didn't care about you, idiot.  
_ "_Are you sure about this?" "I'm sure that I love you, and I trust you not to fuck this up."  
_ Tony kicked the table again, hands gripping it with white knuckles as if he felt he could pull a piece of it out. The memories lingered behind his eyelids, like the aftermath of a bad dream he couldn't shake off.  
Had it all been for nothing? Did he scare the guy so much that he felt too polite to call off the charade?  
Tony needed not to think, he could already feel his pulse speeding and he wasn't prepared to risk a third panic attack in the day.

"_Fuck, Tony, you look like shit man, what happened?"  
_ _Clint's tone was humorous but his eyes held genuine concern as Tony crawled his way into the living room, chasing the signature smell of Steve's blueberry pancakes. _ "_It's Bruce...he's..he's..." Tony's breath hitched again and he clutched his chest. "He left. He's gone."  
_ _The room would have been silent were it not for the clang of a pan hitting the floor. Every eye in the room turned to watch as Steve struggled to pick it back up, his expression terrified.  
_ "_What are you stood here for? If he's out there we need to find him!"  
_ "_Steve..." Tony winced at how pathetically small his own voice sounded. "It's over. He's gone."_  
_Rage flushed his features as he stomped over, grasping the smaller man's sweat stained shirt as he locked eyes with him, bearing an expression so fierce it sent a shiver down Tony's spine.  
_ "_And you're just gonna let him go? I'd figure you of all people would know the danger he's putting himself in. General Ross could..."_ _Tony forced himself not to flinch at the name as he attempted to regain his composure.  
_ "_He told Jarvis not to mention he was gone,. Whenever he's gone, he doesn't want to be found."  
_ _Steve shook his head in disbelief. _ "_And you're going to let him run, just like that?"  
_ _Clint spoke up hesitantly. _ "_Bruce has been on the run for years before Shield found him, he knows how to hide himself."  
_ "_I was suppose to be the one who made him feel comfortable and safe enough to want to stay, and I fucked that up. What makes you think he wants to come back?" _ "_Jesus Christ Tony, are you honestly that blind?!" Steve Rogers just cursed. Clint fought to suppress a giggle. "You call yourself a genius, yet you're clearly oblivious to how he feels."  
_ "_Yeah, I am." Tony's words were filled with bile. "I was so caught up in what I wanted that I forgot to make sure he was okay, and now he's gone."  
_ "_I was referring to the fact that he clearly loves you, Tony."  
_ "_Yeah, loves me so much he left me." The words were mumbled but the Captain heard them perfectly clear. He pushed passed Tony and fumbled for his jacket.  
_ "_Well, Mr Philanthropist, you can mope around all day in self pity if you wish but I, for one, am going to do something." _ _He slammed the door behind him as he left._

Tony should have followed him. He should have taken on-board that Steve was right. His main focus should have been searching but instead he accepted the fate and didn't choose to prevent it. He'd spent so long fighting against the fate that Bruce had laid out for himself in order to prove that he was worth something, and the moment he needed to fight most he let him walk away. Thank god for Captain America. Guilt surged through his system as his gut fought on what to do. Twiddling his phone in his hands, he wondered if, at the very least, Cap deserved an apology.  
"Jarvis, how long has it been since Steve left?"  
"Four hours and forty six minutes precisely, Sir."  
"How long since Bruce left?"  
"Six hours and three minutes, Sir."  
_Six hours. _Tony rolled with his gut and called Steve, hoping for an update of some sort.

"Hey, Tony?" The voice on the other end of the line sounded rather resigned.  
"Hey Steve, I just wanted to apologize for the way I was earlier, I just..."  
"Tony." His voice sounded rushed as he cut in. "It's fine, I have him. He's okay."  
Tony's breath hitched in his throat. He wasn't going to hope, he couldn't hope.  
"Wait, what do you..." his words died in his throat as he heard two voices talking in hushed whispers on the other end. Steve was mumbling about taxis and a chuckle emitted for someone else, a small but rough sound that Tony could pinpoint at any time of the day. His favorite sound, the sound of Bruce's laughter. _Well shit. _ "Bruce?" His voice was uncharacteristically quiet, hope beginning to fill his lungs.  
"Found him curled up just outside Brooklyn, poor guy didn't get very far. He's lucky I knew the neighborhood."  
Tony gasped, nearly dropping the phone as his head began to race. Bruce was okay, he was safe. Steve had Bruce. _Bruce was coming home.  
_ "Steve I don't...I can't...thank you." He chuckled softly. "It was my pleasure. Anything you want me to pass on?" The clipped tone suggested that Steve didn't want to hear anything too impersonal, but Tony had just recovered for the scare of his life and he'd be damned if mentally scarring Captain America was last on the list of his priorities. He cleared his throat.  
"Robert Bruce Banner, if you are not here and on your knees in five minutes I will programme Jarvis to lock you up securely whenever I see fit and I will fuck you so damn hard you won't be able to walk away from me again and it will be so damn good I will ruin you for anyone else. I swear to god I will make you see fucking Asgard."  
"I'm holding you to that one, Mr Stark."  
Tony let out a strangled gasp in response. Goddamnit, Bruce had picked up the phone. Bruce was okay. He was okay and he was coming back. Relief flushed over Tony so fast he felt dizzy and elated.  
"You're a bastard and I love you so much, now get your dead ass home."

Tony hung up and let the tears flow freely. Fuck what Steve had heard, fuck the fact that the only other person to feel anything near as close to what Tony did for Bruce had rescued him like the hero he truly was, one Tony could never be. Bruce was coming home. Bruce had spoken without the clipped anger or resigned sigh Tony had been expected. He had sounded...oddly content. Tony sighed and crawled to the coach sitting at the other end of the lab. He flopped down, finding he was too giddy for the tired fog behind his eyes to drag him under. He waited, and waited, and waited. Until what felt like another eternity had passed.  
"Hey Jarv, how long has it been?"  
"Since you called Mr Rogers? Forty five minutes, Sir."  
Saying a big fuck you to the overly attached girlfriend cliche, he pulled out his phone again.  
_You're late. Punishments are currently being drafted. Tell me, whip or paddle?  
_ The fact that the text had been sent to Steve's phone and was going to be read by him first, made hitting send even more satisfying. He had to wait barely two minutes for a response.  
_I'm in trouble, you do what you need to. - BB  
_ Tony bit back the urge to respond by informing him that what Tony needed to do at this exact moment in time was in fact him. He couldn't fight the grin that was spreading across his face at a response that was so typically Bruce it hurt. Never putting forward his own needs, but focused on working for everyone else's.  
_P.S My answer is I'd prefer your bare hands. If not an option, whip.  
_ Tony's eyes misted up again.

He let himself relax, finally able to breathe as the knot in his stomach came slowly undone and loosened the grip on his lungs, allowing him to focus his breathing freely again. The knots in his body began to unscrew and he let himself sink into the chair, lost sleep and the burden of a carousel of emotions crushing him began to creep up on him. He was still for a long time, the rise and fall of his chest becoming rhythmic as his eyes shut close.

The stiffness of his joints told him he couldn't have been out for very long, but the first thing he noticed when his vision came into focus once again was a silhouette lounging on the wall of the entrance to the lab. For a second Tony froze, hands flying up to the arc reaction as an automatic reflex, until the figure raised it's hands in surrender, and Tony could make out glasses and a warm face that was anything but threatening. He slowly clocked the obnoxiously bright yellow shirt and hands nervously shifted into khaki's, despite the casual demeanor.  
Holy crap.  
_Bruce._

Giving himself barely a second to recall how to walk, Tony was up and closing the gap quicker than the other man could register. He looked ready to take a small step back, had Tony been slower. Tony, however, wasted no time in clambering over and grasping the man in a bone crushing embrace before he had a chance to open his mouth and speak. Tony's arms crushed Bruce's waist so tightly he struggled to breathe, and his face became buried in his neck, goatee scratching the exposed skin. No words, nothing but silence filled the air. Bruce slowly snaked his own arms around Tony's back, as if holding him in place. He sighed contently as he rested his chin on Tony's head, breathing in the familiar smell of grease and sweat that was Tony Stark's signature cologne.

"Hey there." Bruce's voice was soft but Tony gripped tighter, not moving his face as he spoke.  
"You left." The words were half an accusation, half a question. His voice becoming almost a whine. Bruce flinched a little and began to rub comforting circles in his back. He let the words hang in the air for a minute before he forced up the courage to speak.  
"I know, and I'm sorry. It just...it got too much. You know I'm not used to this kind of affection, or any kind for that matter. I was working in the lab and managed to burn some research papers and it brought the all the guilt back." Tony flinched for a brief second. "For a second I thought it would be the right thing but, I managed to find Brooklyn before I realized that I was an idiot. Then I got scared."  
"Scared?" This time Tony turned to look at him, drinking in the guilt that swam inside his eyes.  
_My doing, again.  
_ "Yeah. I knew it wouldn't take you long to work out that I'd left. I kinda hoped I'd get a little further before you did, to give me an excuse not to turn back. To be honest, I'd figured you'd be angry rather than scared. You've given me so much and I repay you by doing...this..."  
"Bruce." Tony's voice was quiet but level as he fought to keep the man's gaze. "Bruce." he snaked his arm out in order to grasp his chin, forcing him to maintain eye contact. "I'm not about to lie, you scared the living hell out of me." His gaze dropped to the floor and he shuffled his feet, ashamed. Tony's gripped tightened, forcing him to look up again. "I blamed myself. It was my job to notice when you were feeling uncomfortable, and I failed to do that right when you needed me to. I'm sorry for that. I'm sorry I didn't have the balls to come after you myself. I let you run because I could only think that it was something I'd done. I'm not going to let you self-deprecate because of that."  
"Oh, Tony." The sigh was half affectionate, half exhausted."Why did you think I came back, hmm?" his face broke into a dopey smile, squeezing him lightly. "The demons in my head can get too loud, that's my problem. They spoke and in a moment of weakness I listened. The main thing I'm apologetic for is that this is a rather crap way of me proving my feelings."  
"Bruce, you don't have to..."  
"No. I want to." He pulled Tony's lips to his in a hungry kiss. It took all Tony's strength not to keep his legs from buckling underneath him. He threw every emotion that had fled through his gut in those few hours into it, passionate and desperate and craving all at the same time. Bruce's hands moved to his shoulders, steering him into the center of the room whilst making sure not to break the kiss off.

When he did, the sudden break of contact startled Tony, until he understood what Bruce was doing. The physicist had sunk onto his knees in front of the engineer, coupled with a coy smile and _oh god _Tony was about to break. He slowly knelt so he was at eye level before running his hands into Bruce's curls in a demanding fashion, pulling his lips to his ear.  
"I'm not going to hurt you. You understand that, right?"  
Bruce nodded, but his gaze was fixed to the floor.  
"Say it."  
He didn't miss a beat, gaze locking as if he were challenging Tony.  
"You won't hurt me."  
Tony rose so he towered over Bruce, fingers still running through his curls.  
"You know what you've done, yes?"  
Bruce nodded. "I left you."  
Tony smirked cockily, eyes sparkling with a mischievous glint that had Bruce slightly concerned.  
"And what are you never going to do again?"  
"Run."  
"Pardon?"  
"I've never going to run again."  
The silence told Bruce that Tony wasn't completely satisfied with his words.  
"I'm not going to leave you."  
Tony sighed, grip becoming a little tighter. He cupped Bruce's chin so he was no longer looking at the floor.  
"Safe-words?"  
His tone was softer this time, less demanding.  
"Red, yellow, green."  
His pupils dilated and a chill went down his spine as Tony's goatee scratched his skin once more and he whispered in his air this time, voice rough but demanding. The tone that Bruce swore should be illegal because _oh fuck _he'd be damned if it didn't make him want to rip the engineers clothes off there and then.  
"Oh Doctor, I'm going to break you and put you back together so well you won't be able to leave again."

If any of the other team mates heard the sounds that came from the lab that afternoon, or noticed the way Bruce couldn't walk properly for a full week afterwards, they knew well enough not to mention anything.


End file.
